I couldn't make this stuff up - part 2 (they're creepy and they're kooky)

You all know that I love my apartment; It's charming and within walking distance of so much wonderful stuff (the beach, great shops and restaurants). However, it's old.

Last Thursday, I was prepared to go about my normal Thursday routine: go to work, head to the grocery store, make dinner, clean my apartment, read and head to bed by 10:00 in order to wake up at 5 a.m. the next morning. I truly enjoy my Thursday nights and feel like I can reclaim my life on this lovely night of the week!

As you might imagine from the title of this post, a couple of weeks ago all did not go according to plan. After returning from the grocery store I ate my dinner and cleaned up in the kitchen. However, when I turned the light in my dining room back on I saw something scurry across the floor.

Right.
Something Big.
Almost 2 inches long.
Did I mention it was fat too?
Ok, you get the idea.

"Oh, my gosh," I think to myself, "a cockroach."
So, I did the only logical thing. I grabbed my shoe (and briefly pondered whether it was sturdy enough to kill the mammoth bug). I then smacked the shoe onto said bug until I saw goo ooze out. Yes it was nasty, but at least I knew that thing wasn't going to live to walk another day. Sidebar: cockroaches are incredibly oozy.

I threw the cockroach remains in the trash washed my shoe and then sat back down at my dining room table. "What if I just think that it was a cockroach, but really it was some other bug?" I thought, "Maybe it is even something less nasty, like a cute Florida bug that looks like what I think a cockroach looks like. I mean, I've never seen a cockroach, so who's to say that giant thing that is now dead in my trash really is actually one in the first place."

So, I pulled out my laptop and performed a quick Google image search for "cockroach." What do you suppose I see on my screen? Yep, a bug that appears to be the identical twin to my Thursday night visitor. Yuck.

Well, I should have left it at that, but no. I was freaked out. I had to know more about how to rid myself of what very well might be a infestation. You never know. The following is a list of what I learned about cockroaches along with what ran through my mind at the time:

1. They leave paths in their feces. Paths that allow their families and friends to find their way into my apartment (YUCK! YUCK! YUCK! Mental note: scrub every surface).
2. Females leave egg sacks that contain 40 eggs (Will I recognize an egg sack when I see one. Oh my gosh, I know there are babies just waiting to hatch in my apartment).
3. Egg sacks look like small brown tic tacks (Gross).
4. Some cockroaches FLY (WHAT THE...). I learned this from a co-worker who has been hit in the head by this lovely bug more than once in his life. Um, I think that it goes without saying, but I would have FREAKED out if a cockroach had flown into my head. I didn't want my feet to touch the ground after the incident. Seriously is anyplace safe from these pests?
5. Cockroaches LOVE tropical climates. Most people I told this story to just said "welcome to FL." (Are you kidding me? I didn't know that when I moved. Seriously, I feel betrayed.)

Well, needless to say I haven't seen one since, although I called my landlord who gave me the number of an exterminator. I don't know if the bug poison made a real difference, but I sure feel better. It's probably like airborne though: the difference is all in my head.